change not

what do you do when you want to say i love you but you aren't sure if its true?
what do you do when you want to step forward, but that means stepping off a cliff?
what do you do when the end of the story comes, but you know more comes afterwards?
what do you do when every sentence starts to sound the same?


how do you react when he tries to hold your hand, but you don't want him to.
when she wants to be friends, but you just don't like her.
when they expect you to do one thing, but you do the complete opposite.
when you're you, but no one realizes it.


why do we mask our true self?
why do we run from what we want?
why?
why?
why.


is it the a terrible beast
in the night?
it roars and screams,
killing our dreams and breathing life
into our fears.


wishing to make us
conform
yield
bend.


but we have to resist.
we must hold firm
to what we know:


that the love is true
the cliff has stairs
there is a sequel
and the sentences sound the same because we have a limited vocabulary.


he likes you. deal with it. other people don't like you so well.
be her friend, because she needs one, not because you do.
do both: the expected and the opposite. but do the opposite first,
so they know that you will be you first, not last.
then they will see you.
not your reflection
or your mask.


they will see the self that you run from.
the self that you run from because its beautiful -
not like what they want you to be.
it's a glorious creation,
not the beast everyone tries to accuse it of being.


But you are perfect.
just you.
not what they want you to be.
will you conquer it - the expectation?
expectations are just ripples on the lake, so flimsy, only created by wind.
they aren't the lake itself.


expectations leave.
change
differ
from generation to generation

and each has a higher standard

than the last.

expectations are unreliable.

you are not.

so, if you're confused about the words that are in bold (as my mother informed me that she was) try this: read the poem once through, just regular, don't put emphasis on the bold words. Then read it again, but this time ONLY read the words in bold. two poems in one! bad-um-tsh....yep. Enjoy!